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The most obvious thing I can think of is the use of the word 'macintosh'. I'd have thought (and I could be wrong) that most searchers would just be searching for 'Mac'

So for example on the home...

Yes, that's exactly right. Many 'expert' copywriters recommend keeping sentences short and to the point. The reality is you need to get a balance.

Actually my view is you're not far off achieving...

Reading through there are a few spelling mistakes - or more to the point the context or presentation of words. Anyone reading would most likely notice that and note you are a not a native English...